Friday, August 29, 2014

7 Months Old

Where is the time going? My child is 7 months old. Its hard to believe that this time last year I was still pregnant with him and wildly uncomfortable and not sleeping. Well, I'm a little more comfortable now but still not sleeping. Looks like my mom was right in saying I wont get sleep until they are 18. Fingers crossed I get some before then because I wont survive.
So Dominic is growing like a weed and learning so much more as each day goes on. He is about 19lbs and around 27". Hes such a good eater which is crazy because I'm not, and I am so happy he is. We are on a pretty good schedule now however his sleeping hasn't improved and I'm worried that it will never get back to being good and that I will have sleepless nights for the rest of my life.
He started saying "Mamamama" and would wake up crying and saying it. That lasted for a few days. Then it turned into "bababababa" and quickly turned into "dadadadadada" and that has been happening for about 2 weeks now. I keep trying to get him back on the mama train but no dice.
He rolls all around the room to get places and loves playing with his toys. He wants to stand all the time but wants to have me help him, which gets tiring because I want to do things as well. Hes still in his "how dare you leave me and go into another room" stage and freaks out and cries. However, if he is out of the house with other people, or even if Dey or someone else is over and is in the same room he is perfectly ok, but the moment they leave hes back to being super needy. Don't get me wrong, I love that he loves me and wants to be close to me but, I need some space too and need to get some work done. I let him cry a lot during the day so I can get things done, but after a while I still have to pick him up and do things handed, like make chocolate chip cookies.
He still doesn't have any teeth but he is very bothered by them. I'm hoping all 4 pop through at the same time because it will mean all the suffering will be done and over with at once for a little while.
The other night he had a bit of a fever for a second time. The first time was after his 4 month shots, but this time it was just because. He has had a runny nose and some semi loose poops (more so than normal) and these have all been linked to teething so I think the end is near! His fever didn't last long at all and it wasn't that high, but it was just enough that he was bothered and not able to go back to sleep for a bit.
I have stopped putting him in 3-6 month clothes and have been slowly packing them up, especially because the weather is starting to cool down here. It makes me really sad to know that he isn't a little baby anymore. I want him to grow up and but I want him to stay small and want to cuddle with me.
I was told today, as I have been many other times, about how amazing his eyes/eyelashes are and how girls will be falling over him because of them. I have decided that if ever a girl comes over, even to play, I will tell them that they have he wrong house and no Dominic lives here. I want to keep him mine forever... yeah I know that wont happen but still, he is my first born and my little boy. I want him to stay mine forever.
We have decided that because the electrical in this house cannot be trusted that until we move into another place he will be in our room, so we have moved his crib in our room. Yes we don't have as much walking space but we have enough to get by and he likes his crib a lot. He even tries to pull himself up if we sit him closer to the side.
I am getting closer to the end of my leave and I think about it everyday and how sad that makes me. Be prepared for many tears shed on that fateful day.
I am excited for all of his firsts that will coming so soon and cannot wait to celebrate them with him.
I know that being a mom isn't easy and it is hard a lot of the time, but it is honestly the most worthwhile thing in this life (at least to me.)
I love my baby and cannot believe he is mine forever!

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Uncle Meets Nephew

Last Wednesday I headed to the airport to pick up my brother at midnight. I was so stinking tired but I was so excited that I was getting to see my brother and he was able to meet Dominic.
Dominic didn't sleep much that night and was awake when we got home so they got to see each other right away. I think this was a blessing in a way because when we got up in the morning Dominic remembered who he was and wasn't upset being left with him.
One of the first things Josh said when he saw Dominic was "Uhhh his hair has red in it!?" ... Yes, its true, my son has a tint of red in his hair. You can thank the Blakeney side for that.

We went to IKEA on Thursday (Josh has never been) and he wanted to look at some items because one of the stores in Ontario will ship to NS and he wanted to see what things were really like in comparison to the catalog. Then on Friday we went to Banff and Lake Louise where Josh jumped in the water. My brother is crazy!! He said it was pretty cold. Duh, it's glacier water! We had lunch, where Josh got hit on by a man and hung out and headed home.
Now Josh picked up right where he left off and picked on me like crazy. I caught myself crying in the car because I knew he was the one leaving soon and it made me miss my family that much more.

When we got home Josh got ready because he was hanging out with some friends and Jeremy came to town so they could drive up to Edmonton together the next day. It was the first time in a little over 2 years since the 3 of us have been together and it felt great. It was a bitter sweet moment because they weren't staying long but it was so nice to have them here. Josh and Jeremy were cuddle buddies that night and it made it feel like old times for me when we would be on vacation and the 2 of them would share a bed in the Hotel.

Saturday the boys said that they were going to do the Luge at C.O.P. and I asked if it was an open invite and they said yes so we all went.
First Jeremy, Josh and I went down, then Myself and Dey, then Jeremy, Josh and Dey, then just Jeremy and Josh. It was so worth it and honestly so much fun. I want to go back so bad! However my tailbone is killing me now.
I made sure that we got a picture before they left. This was the only decent one where the boys weren't being their ridiculous selves and making faces. I love them.

I love my family, and I wish that my brothers stayed a little longer, but I am thankful for the little time I did get to spend with them.
Now its just a waiting game for Nova Scotia. Come on Sealing Clearance!!

Friday, August 15, 2014

Play Time + Some

This past week has been one of the hardest I have had since becoming a mom. Dominic has been extremely fussy and being a real sooke. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely that he wants to curl up in my arms and snuggle into my chest, but it has made it very difficult to get things done.
Nap times, along with smiles, have been very hard to come by. Not to mention a good nights rest for either of us. You would think that because he isn't getting his required amount during the night that he would at least take his naps during the day. Unfortunately this has not been the case and has made for many days inside. No one wants to deal with a cranky loud crying baby in public.
His night time routine has had some good days but also some not so good days, but things are slowly getting better... at least I hope that they are.

Yesterday was particularly hard because it seemed like no matter what was done he would just cry over nothing. He didn't want to play, he didn't want to cuddle, he didn't want to eat very much or sleep, and his diaper was changed, so I was left sitting in my rocking chair for the majority of the day only to get up to go to the bathroom which resulted in a freak out.

Over the past few days play time with smiles have been hard to come by but I was able to quickly capture a few moments, and these are the moments that make me forget about all the screams and tears.

Playing "Where'd you go!?" (He doesn't smile for Peek-a-Boo)

Hes shaking his soother around like crazy. Hes fascinated by it. Hes also moving too quick to see it

I bought the connect mats that have numbers in them. They range from 0-9. That is 10 squares but it doesn't make for a very big play area if you just do 2 rows, but it makes for an odd square out if you do 3 rows of 3 so the 0 got cut. Dominic pushed the 0 out and found out how to get it around his head. He got quite frustrated when he couldn't get it off... Playtime ended pretty quickly for him.

My exercise ball that I rarely used was taken out the other day to rest my legs on while I sat in my chair. Dominic let me put him down for a brief moment. He and the ball became fast friends, especially when I would hold him and let him jump on it.

Speaking of jumping, this kid is a jumping jellybean these days. He LOVES it! Not only does he do that but he has started shaking his head back and forth and going from blowing his lips together to sticking his tongue out and doing it. I don't mind it unless he has a lot of drool because it tends to go all over me and my glasses.

So the past couple of days I have been extra emotional in the sense that I have caught myself crying over the fact that my baby really isn't a "baby" anymore. Yes in age he still is but he has grown up so quick that its hard to remember what it was like with a baby that was just a bump on a log so to speak.
I am having a hard time wanting to move forward with him growing. Of course I cant wait to see who he becomes and hear his voice all the time and see what his personality will be like, but its hard to want to let go of the littleness that is him.
I have these fears that because it was so easy to get pregnant before that the next time will be extremely hard or that I wont be able to have anymore and this breaks my heart. I have always wanted a big family and to think that it might not happen is hard. No I have not been told that this is a possibility, but because my body has been all over the place since giving birth I have a feeling that being pregnant may have shot me into early menopause. Sounds crazy I know, but its hard not to think that way when your body is the way it is.

I am having an EXTREMELY hard time accepting that I have to go back to work. Yes it is only for 6 months, but 6 months can feel like a lifetime. All but 1 person who I was ever really close with is gone and that makes it hard. Yes you go to work to work but if you work with people you enjoy then it makes it so great. I have come to realize that my life long dream of being a mom is the ONLY thing that I want to do/be. Yes I hate being stuck at home all the time by myself, but I would take these days over getting up and spending 9 hours away from my child 5 days a week. Yes I know that I have talked about my dreading going back to work but it has become more real as the time is passing on and it too has made me cry. I am going to have to give up on a life that I love and suites me more than any other thing in this world.

I love my life so much and am happier than I have ever been. Yes, like everyone, I have my days when I am cranky and upset and feeling beat down, but in a whole I am so happy. My life brings me so much joy. I have had an amazing first year and a bit of being married. Dey, although he gets on my nerves sometimes (as everyone does), has been amazing and treats me so well and I am blessed to have him in my life and call him my love. I cannot wait to get home this fall (its been pushed back due to slow moving authorities) and be sealed. Tonight Dey went to the temple and it was hard dropping him off and not going with him. I could go through now if I wanted, which I do, but my mom has asked me to wait until I come home so she can be there with my nanny. Yes my worldly self sees it as a plus because there are things I can still wear (VS anyone??) but a bigger part of me is anxious for it.
This week I got a call from the Bishop asking me to give a talk at the end of the month and I was brought up to always say yes no matter how hard it is for you to get up... I am still awaiting the topic... and I was informed that things with our sealing clearance is finally moving forward and it has brought me hope that it will get done soon, and I think because we have a baby Salt Lake will decide quicker on things because we have already been married for over a year and why make us wait any longer?? I'm hoping to get home before Michelle comes back out here because I know how much she wants to see Dominic get blessed, and we are waiting to do it there.

My life has changed so much since moving out here and I couldn't have asked for anything better. I am thankful for the life I have led thus far, including when I lived a life not so perfectly because I have learned many life lessons that I can pass onto my children. Yes children, I am hoping for 4!

As I am sitting with Dominic asleep at the foot of my bed (I don't trust the electrical to put him in his own room) I feel a sense of calm and peace rush over me. Tonight I am just happy, tired yes, but happy.
Life is good and I thank God for it, as he is the one who has let me have this life that I take for granted too often. I owe my life to him and am forever grateful.  

Tuesday, August 12, 2014


So lately as Dominic has gotten bigger and I have been walking around with him in his stroller and car seat, yes car seat, I have come to realize that he is too big for the car seat because he keeps trying to sit up in it.
Some people have told me to put him in his stroller, not in the car seat, and I have done it many times but he screams bloody murder ad wont calm himself down.
I remembered seeing my friends stroller that she told me about and I instantly thought that it would be the best thing for us. Ever since then I have seen this stroller every where. It is the City Select stroller that grows with your family.
It has a chair that you can have face you (big plus because Dominic just wants to be sure that he is not alone), it has an add on where you can put a second chair and face whichever way you want. It has an add on where you can put your car seat if you have another child and put the second one in the front, and it also has an add on where its a stand in the back for a third child to use so they can wheel around with you.
Honestly this is the dream stroller for me and Dey has even stopped strangers asking them why it's so great. I'm hoping he caves on it soon because we cant carry Dominic every place we go.
This stroller is not cheap but I have found them on Kijiji for cheaper than you get brand new by about 200$. To me this is a steal.
Today while walking I literally saw the stroller about 4 times in less than 3km. I think that this is a sign that we should buy it.
Send good vibes my way that Dey lets me get this stroller :)

Friday, August 8, 2014

Sleeping Pattern (... Or lack thereof)

So when Dominic was first born I wasn't the one who picked him up right away at night. The first couple nights he spent in the nursery at the hospital because I couldn't get up fast enough for him.
When we brought him home he refused to be swaddled and wouldn't stay down in his bed. After falling asleep I would put him down and he would wake up immediately every single time. My mom even tried to train him to sleep by himself but it just didn't work.
Finally he let us swaddle him and with that and the sound machine I was finally able to sleep laying down by myself. He would wake up maybe once a night and go back to sleep. Some nights he would even sleep for 10 hours straight. Then there were others when he would decide to stay up until about 2am. I broke that pretty quick.
I got him going to bed around 930-10 and he would wake up somewhere between 4-6am (once) and go back to sleep then get up at about 830. I had his nap schedule down to 10am, 1230/1pm, 430pm, and 630. Slowly as he has gotten older his nap times have changed to 10am, 130pm, and 530pm and going to bed around 830.
When he would nap during the day I would hold him and then put him down some place secure and let him sleep while I did things fairly close by.
When he got his first set of vaccinations he started waking up exactly 1 hour after going to sleep, I would put the soother back in his mouth and put my hand on his cheek and he would go back to sleep waking up around 4am wanting to be fed then going back to sleep.
Oh yeah, let me tell you, he has always been the type of baby who needs to be nursed and held to go to sleep.
I started a new schedule which included a bath every night before bed to help soothe and relax him before bed and it seemed to work.
So as time went on his sleeping got a bit better and stopped waking up an hour after going to bed and just waking up the once or not all. Then he started growing and teething (still no teeth yet) and he started going to sleep and waking up a few times after going to sleep but was easily put back to sleep but at 2am would wake up and between 2-830 he started waking up 4-6 times a night and the only way to get him back to sleep was to nurse him. At that time I started bringing into the bed with me because I would fall asleep feeding him at 2am and he would get up again shortly there after wanting to be nursed again.
Now since his second set of shots he has been waking up after going to bed and is either awake for the next 2-3 hours or needs to be held to go to sleep. And would continue his 2am wake up routine.
I decided to move his schedule up and do a couple things different to get him to sleep because I hate that I have to nurse him all the time because it gets hard and tiring, and quite frankly I need a bit of a break some times.
So the other night I started feeding him dinner a bit earlier and then I would nurse him around 6/630, give him some cereal, then his bath, read him a story and put him in bed. Because he needs to know I am not leaving him I sat there and watched him because the moment I would leave the room he would scream bloody murder. The first night it took about an hour of on and off again screaming and my hand on his cheek and he finally fell asleep. Now he woke up a few times where I just had to put the soother back in his mouth and he went right back to sleep. He woke up at midnight wanting to be fed and then went back to sleep until 4am where I fed him again and he only woke up one other time after that before his 830 wake up for the day. For me this was an improvement.
Last night I did the same thing, however it was a bit later because I was out for a walk and came back a bit late. He did not do as well as I would have liked. He cried for almost 2 hours and I finally gave in and picked him up and let him sit with me in the rocking chair and put him to sleep. He did his same wake up around 2am and continuous wake ups after that. 

My Night looked like this.

These past few weeks he hasn't been napping by himself  because his abuelita is in town and she wants to spend so much time with him. Unfortunately I think that this has been part of an issue because hes gotten used to being with someone when he sleeps. I don't want to deprive her of spending this time with him because she might not get to see him again for a long time.
Needless to say I am starting over on Monday with his day time routine and fingers crossed he gets better.