Melt My Heart

On July 28th 2014 I got a glimpse of the voice that will be my sons. Ninette was bathing Dominic and when she was getting him dressed for bed she turned to me with him in her arms and he, for the first time actually full fledge turned his body and reached out for me. He also started babbling, which he does a lot, and this time it was a new sound. He put his bottom lip in his mouth almost and went "mamamama" I was so thrilled and excited. Then later that night when he woke up crying because he's alone, as he does every night, he cried out saying the same thing. It has become his go to sound when he's upset. I know that he doesn't realize what he's doing but to hear him say mama in any way shape or form just melts my heart and reassures me that I am a good mother because he is growing up so well. 

He is a handful a lot and he's not the type of baby who can cry himself to sleep or grows tired of crying, he cries until he hyperventilates and keeps crying and can't calm himself down, so he needs to be cuddled and held a lot. But these sweet moments make all of the hard ones so much more than just worth it. This boy has run away with my heart and quite frankly it is the best thing ever. 

6 Months

Dominic is now 6 months old, and it is crazy to think that he is this big already. He has been growing so fast and I want him to slow down. I see other little babies and I am scared of them now because I am so used to the tank that is my son.

So there are few things I wanted to make sure that I talked about because I don't want to forget anything.
The clinics here for vaccinations book up so stinking quick it is insane! Back home you get your vaccinations at your family doctors but here you get them from the public health nurses so you have to book them quick. I was lucky that with the first set of shots there was a cancellation and we got in 2 weeks after he turned 2 months. So at the end of the appointment we booked our 4 month shots... they didn't have anything available until about 2 weeks before he turned 6 months!!! They book up quick.
Anyway.... we went to get his shots and of course he was getting 3 again and they wanted myself and Dey to get a shot too. Now for those who know me really well know about my irrational fear of needles. Yes I understand that it is crazy to be this scared of them, especially after having a baby and a C-section, but I just cant seem to get over it. Yes I also know its all in my head but again, I just cant get passed it... Sooooo I told the nurse that I better go first because I will have the hardest time with it and I know Dominic will cry and I would like to be done with mine when he gets his to calm him down. So they start getting the needles ready and the heavy breathing starts. Because I am waiting for the needle I tense us and once I have the needle I am able to calm myself back down. This time for some reason my arm hurt really badly right away and the nurse said its because I had my tetanus shot 2 years ago but now they include the whooping cough in it so that's why I needed it again. So my Dominic also got his very first fever that day. It wasn't super bad but it was enough of one that he was more fussy than normal and I had to give him his Tempra.  

A couple days later we went to the zoo (I think I blogged about it already but there is something I wanted to add) and when we stopped to have lunch I needed to change his diaper and honestly, no word of a lie, about 7 women stopped and surrounded us and just oogeled over Dominic and said how cute he was. One girl even said that it was cute babies like this that make her want to have kids. It makes me feel special that people think he's cute. Dey and I were both so sure that we would have an ugly baby so this makes me feel good knowing that it's not just me who thinks he's cute.

Dominic has been panting and whimpering like a dog when he gets excited or mildly upset about something and I cant help but laugh because I don't remember giving birth to a canine baby.

He is also sitting up on his own so well that the doctor at our checkup said she doesn't normally see babies sitting this well without support until 9 months. We were also told he is 17.8lbs and 26". I cant get over how big he is. Our doctor also said we can start giving him pureed meat and egg yokes. He's turning into a big boy already.

He rolls over so much that he's now rolling in his sleep and sleeps on his stomach until he realizes that hes on his stomach and wakes up because hes so mad about being like that.

His bottom tooth has been playing hide and seek FOREVER now. It will bump up to the surface and be so hard one day then the next its back to hiding with a very little bump. It needs to come out asap because its not only driving Dominic crazy but it's driving me crazy too because he eats everything and his cranky a lot. 

A few other things that he has been doing is pulling his soother out and putting it back in and eating the sides of it. He sits in public high chairs quite well now and doesn't scream to get out. He loves hearing Spanish and laughs when Dey and his mom speaks it because it sounds different to him so he thinks its just babble right now. Sometimes when you say hi he will wave his hand at you... other than that he will just wave it forever at a time some days. Also when you say hi to him sometimes he does a semi high pitch noise as if he is saying hi back to you after you have been gone for a little bit.

He also loves sucking his lips and spending time with his Abuelita (little grandmother in Spanish). She is here for another 2 weeks so that's good for them to spend time together and also it has helped me have some time alone... I still haven't tackled my mounds of laundry yet but when I was sick and didn't go to church yesterday she and Dey took him and I was able to nap. I've also been able to make him more baby food to freeze.

He as also been blowing bubbles/his lips all day everyday it seems and he loves it... I however do not because I get covered in spit. Hes been trying to crawl by sticking his bum in the air and his face is down and he tried to move forward which he does a bit some time and some times he moves backwards as well. This means that he is not far from doing it. It makes me happy yet sad at the same time. Looks like we will be getting baby gates and a new car seat pretty soon because he sits up straight in his seat all the time and its not good for him to do that.

Dey was gone for a couple of days and I had Dominic in the bed with me at night and had him on Deys side and he would roll over and cuddle up to my back in the middle of the night. He is a true mamas boy and I secretly love it!

I had to pack away his play mat, bumbo chair (legs got too fat and he would get stuck and be upset) and his vibrating chair. He wants to be on the go all the time and doesn't like to sit still, and now that he is sitting on his own he doesn't wan to lay down and play with his toys. I hate packing things away but I guess that comes with parenthood. We also need to get him new clothes because we don't have enough for 6 months+ or fall/winter clothes. I like shopping so this should be fun. What bugs me is that baby clothes are just as expensive as adults for a third of the material and to be warn for like 1% of their life. At least clothes can be reused when I have another baby... lets face it, even though I desperately want a girl, I will probably get all boys.

 

I love this kid so much it is crazy and it's hard to believe that he is as big as he is. I feel truly blessed to have him in my life and am so grateful that he made me a mom. This is by far the most taxing yet positively rewarding job I have ever had. He is my everything and I could never imagine my life without him. We were destined to be together!

Sitting in the high chairs at Timmy's (ps... not a big fan of the oreo donut)

Rolled in his sleep to my side of the bed.

Loving Abuelita speaking Spanish to him

His best friend Sophie

Sitting by himself with a crash pad of pillows for when he gets tired and topples over

Date Night

Tonight Dey and I went to the movies. It was the first time I've been to the movies in almost 7 months. Dominic stayed home with Ninette and It was still hard for me to leave. It was the second time I left Dominic with someone other than Dey. 

I didn't cry this time so that's progress. 

We went and saw the movie The Purge. It's about a law that is passed in the USA to control the population by allowing everyone to break any and every law for 12 hours once a year. 

I wanted to see it because it's a suspense movie and I didn't want to watch one that was too emotional. 

So part way through the movie a guy came in and started searching through a bunch of chairs on his knees towards the back of the theatre. Dey and I both felt very uncomfortable and were unsure what he was going to do. I honestly started getting really nervous because here are people killing people on the screen and I thought that he was going to pull out a weapon. Dey asked if I wanted to get up and leave and I froze. The guy ended up leaving and Dey followed him out to hear him say that he didn't find what he was looking for. 

Shortly there after another man came in and stood at the back wearing a uniform and stared at us. As we left when the movie was done the uniformed man was standing out there and was wearing a K-9 unit uniform. Honestly I was very tense and thought that I was in trouble. Today's world is so unpredictable and it's made me realize that we never know what could happen to you when you leave the house. I know that this situation isn't anything compared to what others go through but it was quite nerve wracking and it's made me so thankful that I get to live the life I do. I love my family and my friends and feel blessed to be a mother to my son. Tonight I am counting my blessings and wishing that everyone who is or has gone through something tramatic and or life threatening situation find peace love and safety. 

Having Fun

Last week I had the pleasure of accompanying my friend Michelle and her daughter to the swimming pool. I've taken Dominic swimming once before but  it was too cold for him and he didn't like it. This time he took a little while to get used to the water but after a bit he was perfectly ok with it. I love the water and this was a great time for me. No I am not bathing suit ready as my boobs having seemed to quadrupled in size and because I am nursing I'm having issues loosing the rest of the weight... Plus because Dominic wants to eat all the time I have even more milk these days making it seem like I've gained weight. But I won't let that stop me from enjoying something that I love and spending time with my son and having a good time. I don't want to limit myself just because I don't look the way I "should" 

Lyla is turning 6 next week which just shocks me. Where did the time go??? It's hard to believe that she was 3 when I moved out here. 

She is obsessed with Elsa from frozen and they don't have a Disney store back home so every week I've gone to the Disney store looking for something Elsa for her and was finally successful. Josh sent me a picture of her when she got my gift. She was so excited. She also is only holding part of the gift. I love this little girl and miss her like crazy. I cannot wait to see her when we get to go home. 

I also went to the zoo with Michelle and her daughter and bought a membership. It's so worth it because after going twice your membership is paid for. 

This time I got a picture of Dominic in the kangaroo and he didn't seem to mind too much that he was slumped in there. 

Michelle's roommate has a kitten so on Michelle's birthday we went to her house and surprised her with sunflowers, those are ones that she loves, and Dominic met the kitten. He also grabbed the kitten by the scruff of the neck and got a fist full of hair. We tyres to get a good picture of then by each other but both were mesmerized by Michelle and starring at her. 

Dominic is eating solids so I'm doing what I've been told and introducing him to new foods but not more than 2 at a time because if you do too many and they have a reaction you'll have a harder time figuring out which one it is. 

So he's now eating sweet potatoes and actually loves them which is great. So that's a win for sweet potatoes a maybe on apple sauce and a definite no on prunes and carrots unless they are mixed in with his cereal. 

As Dominic has been teething for what seems like since the day he was born, he is putting everything in his mouth. The good things is he's finally using his Sophie but the bad thing is he's wanting to eat everything including his rubber ducky in the tub with gross bath water that he may or may not have peed in. It's a struggle to keep his hand from putting things in his mouth or even just eating everything like food court tables and high chairs. 

This little guy is turning 6 months next week which is crazy to me. But he has been a dream come true and oh so much fun! 

A Post

Tonight I am sitting in my bed, like I do most nights at this time, and I'm feeling very blah!! 

This morning started off great. I went to a stampede breakfast with Dey and Dominic and walked around the mall for a few minutes, where I found an Elsa doll for my mom to give Lyla. 

I needed more cereal for Dominic and also wanted to buy mum-mum rice cookie things because they're a good snack and also apparently good for teething. Dominic loves them and quickly squawks for more once it's done. 

It's Tuesday so Dey is at the office for the night and I have been dealing with a fussy baby. Here's to hoping he sleeps better tonight. 

Where was I??? ... Oh right, breakfast and mall... Well afterwards I was supposed to get together with my one friend Michelle L. and go to the splash park. Unfortunately she had to reschedule and my mood immediately dropped. I wasn't mad at her at all, I was just sad that I was going to have zero interaction outside of Dey and because I was tired after another pretty sleepless night I became a grumpy gal really fast. 

It took everything in me to get myself up and go for a walk. 

I am trapped in the house it seems everyday because I don't have people who want to see me and I don't have a car because Dey has it. 

My walk was great. It was 4.49km. 

Tomorrow, if my plans fall through again, which it seems like they will, I will go for another walk and see where it takes me. 

On another note, I have 4 friends who I miss dearly these days; Cortney, Kayla, Sheila and Megan. These ladies are 4 of the best people I know. They are the ones who I know would be here all the time if they lived closer and it makes my heart ache for good friendships. 

Also, Michelle C. is leaving really soon and I am deeply saddened by it. Yes she will be back soon but until then I will be sad because she has been one of the best friends a girl could ask for. Not once has she forgotten that I am still me even though I am a mom and a wife and she has bonded with Dey and has gotten to know him. She and I have known each other for years and we have always been the type of friends that even if time has gone by since we have hung out it would be as if no time has passed at all. Lately we have been hanging out a lot and it has been a true blessing to me because it has helped keep me sane. 

Even though I've been feeling lost, forgotten and like a convienant friend to some I have been truly blessed with a few wonderful people who have made me feel happy and for them I am grateful. 

5 Months (A little late) + A Little More

Dominic is 5 months old, and has been for a couple weeks now. It is crazy that he is this big already.
He has been growing like a weed and I want to keep him small forever. I think he is slowing down though with the weight gain but he is getting taller quite quickly.
He is eating solids now, mostly cereal, prunes, carrots and apple sauce. We will be starting sweet potatoes here shortly.
He is now a rolling machine and he is trying to learn to roll the other way but he gets frustrated and goes the way he knows best.
He is starting to hate getting changed. Not getting his diaper changed but putting clothes on. Hes fine once they're on but putting them on initially is a chore. I'm gonna have some trouble when he gets bigger. He is also a side sleeper. The moment I put him down he turns himself to the side.
He has been a bit difficult lately because he is teething so he doesn't sleep well and keeps me up a lot.


I have taken him to the lake with Laura and he didn't seem to hate the water. It was a little chilly for him so he was shivering a little but he was perfectly fine.
We celebrated Canada Day with James, Diana, Amelia and Dianas Mom, sister and future brother in law. We had a BBQ and sat out in the backyard with the kiddie pool. It was a beautiful day with some beautiful friends.


I have been going for walks lately by myself and it feels good knowing that I am getting some exercise. Also I have been blessed to have such a good friend in Michelle C. She is always down for a good walk and hang out, even if its at the mall. We (myself and Dominic) just adore her and are so grateful to have her in our lives and we will miss her terribly for the 2 months that she is gone.


I have also been blessed with another friend name Michelle, but she is from work. She is on leave from work right now and she has been making the effort for us to get together. Tomorrow we are going to hang out with her and her daughter Peyton who is the funniest 8 year old I know.


Last week my grandfather passed away and it was hard not being there with everyone. I'm very sad about it but I think not being there has in a way made it easier because when my grammie died and I saw her in her casket I had a break down and it was more real. I think when I get to go home and visit his grave I will have a harder time.
When my grammie was alive she made all of her granddaughters an afghan and it sits on my couch right now. I love that I have that as a reminder of her. Looking at it makes me wish I had something of my grampies so I asked my mom to talk to my nanny to see if she had any of my grampies old hats that he used to wear. My mom talked to my nanny and she said she didn't think she had any because she has been getting rid of his things periodically as he was in a home, but she looked around and remembered that she had one in the closet that she thought of getting rid of countless times but for some reason she thought she better hang onto it. I am so glad she did. I cant wait to have it. I don't know what I will do with it but I am happy that I will have something of his.


My brother and Kim came down this weekend and they are having a baby in September. It doesn't look like she is due then but that's what the doctors say. They don't have a lot of stuff yet so I had bought them some clothes and gave them some of my excess things I had for boys (that's what they are having.) I am sad that they left but I am glad that they are only a few hours away. I miss having family around. I feel bad that they aren't going back to Utah for a while but I am super excited that I get to be around when they have the baby and Dominic will have a little cousin a few hours away.


I cut my hair about a month ago almost and I lost 5lbs from it, but I have been so stinking hot that I am tempted to cut it even shorter to keep cool, but then I think about how long it will take to grow it out again and its a dilemma I am faced with. I'm so tired of being warm but I don't want to have to wait to have longer hair and I also don't want to put it in a pony tail all the time either.... who knows what I will do.


I am loving the summer weather and I hope it never ends. I really don't want winter to come at all. I also want time to pick up so we can go back to NS. Its a waiting game that I am tired of playing.
My mom said today I should stay for a month... I think its a pretty good idea if you ask me!