Monday, November 24, 2014

10 Month Old

How on earth did we get to double digit months??? Honestly, when they say time flies they mean it. It's not just a figure of speech anymore because the last I checked I was still in the hospital eager to get home with my sweet little baby.... Apparently I blinked and time has escaped me.
Dominic finally has teeth, 2 to be exact, and he is a biting machine. He stopped biting me when he nurses so that's a plus. But he does like to come up to me and bite my arm.
He is into everything! he is all over the place and tearing the place apart. I don't bother cleaning sometimes for days because hes just going to make a mess again and it is pointless.
He isn't sleeping much better, but I have stopped nursing and rocking him to sleep now. I am able to lay at the end of my bed and put my hand in the crib and he holds/lays on it until he falls asleep. He was sleeping the first 3.5-4 hours straight before waking, but the past few days that has changed and he has been waking up 3+ times before midnight even hits... and then he wakes what seems like 10 million more times after midnight.. I still love him though!
He waves, gives kisses, gives high fives, smacks his lips if we do it first, turns the lights on/off, he crawls pretty fast, he knows who pooh bear is, he walks along furniture, he pulls himself up on walls, he talks with his little walking toy, he loves the fridge and every time I open it he comes a running so he can shut the door on me or try to get inside, and he has even taken 1 single step by himself before face planting into my arms.
He has such an attitude, which I am sure he gets mostly from me. He likes to defy me while looking back at me with a semi smile while doing it.
He's slowly starting to know the sign for milk, although it looks more like a wave, but when I do it and say milk he does it back.
When I ask him if he wants to do something, and if he does, he will make a certain sound that has an excited tone to it that means he wants to do it.
This little boy is growing so fast I wouldn't believe it were possible if I haven't witnessed it first hand.
I know that once we get to NS he will just grow so much more. I want time to slow down, but I know that wont happen, so I guess I really want time to speed up so that way I can be done working already.
Heres to hoping Dominic doesn't grow up too quickly!!!


These past few weeks I have been taking the temple prep courses and because I am in primary I have been doing them before church. This has made for some very long sundays. Also because I am leaving in 9 days we had to speed things up a bit and boy am I glad we did! I was able to have classes combined and got them all done in 4 weeks. I also was able to get my recommend from the bishop and stake president, which is not an easy thing to do because our stake president isn't around a lot.
So friday in preparation for going home and going through the temple for the first time, we went to the distribution centre. I was told I should bring someone with me but there really wasn't anyone around so it was just Dey and myself. People say it is overwhelming going and getting everything, but I was lucky to have the best Customer Service patron ever, Brenda.
We walked in the store, I was a little nervous but more excited than anything, we were immediately greeted by 2 ladies and they said "are you ok to just help yourselves?" and I said "Not really, I am going through for my first time." Brenda immediately walked over to us with the biggest warmest smile on her face and said "Lets start with the dresses. I think it's best to start here and work our way over." I just followed her lead and away we went.
She showed me the dresses and said "We have a lot of styles and normally people will just glance at them and one will stand out to them" then she looked me up and down and said "we do have the Barbie doll dress that is made for our bigger boobed sisters..." Yes, I have big boobs, but hopefully when I stopped nursing (which I will be starting to wean pretty soon here) my boobs will go back down. Plus the dress looked like too much for me and looked really heavy.
There was one that I saw on the mannequin that I was drawn to and so I tried that one on along with the skirt. The dresses I think are made kind of small, but I couldn't avoid getting the size I did. The skirts were just not cutting it, but the dress when I tried it on was a perfect fit for me and I felt kind of pretty in it. I know they say when you go to the temple its not about what you look like and not to think of trying to look pretty, but in this dress I felt wonderful.
Then we went to the tights and shows and everything else for the ceremony and the lady was too funny. I would pick things out and she would be like "oh good that's my favorite" or when she would get me to pick between fabrics or styles she would say "pick me pick me" haha So I did.
Then we went over the garment part and because I took a pole of my friends and what their favorite style was I went ahead with that and she assumed I would as well.
She told me I should maybe get a cotton pair for sleeping in because, and I quote, "Now that you're active, like you know active, you may want these to let things breathe." I honestly had to keep myself from laughing so hard.
This lady was such a sweet spirit and made me going there and getting everything seem like a breeze. I was pretty thrilled with it all, minus the amount of money it cost, but still that's ok. It will all be worth it in the end.
I cannot wait to get home and have this happen, even if it's just me going through and not us being sealed just yet... still waiting for the clearance to come in. Either way it will be great!

Saturday, November 22, 2014

Why Bother?

Since having my son it has taken me a while to start working out. At first it was because I had a c section, so I had to wait at least 6 weeks before I could even lift anything heavier than my baby, and after the 6 weeks "ok" from the doctor I was still nervous about doing anything because the middle of my incision wasn't healing as quick as the rest.
Dominic was born in January and in may I started off small and did the 30 day squat challenge. Then when June hit I decided to do the 3 day Ab challenge. I did the first, lets say week, and then my incision bubbled up and popped open and left a hole. It wasn't a big enough hole that I was worried and should see a doctor, but it was enough that I was nervous to do anything else.
I started walking 5k a few times a week but when Deys mom came I got out of the habit and have been having trouble finding the motivation to do anything really since then.
Now the past couple of weeks I have been doing minor things at night when Dominic goes to sleep and yesterday I woke up and my scar was bothering me. Now this happens every once and while anyway, but when I looked at it, it bubbled up again and then it popped open. It is not a pretty site and it makes me wonder why I even bother trying to do anything that could help me lose weight because my scar seems to hate me and makes it hard to do anything. I have given up pop now for about 2 months, and I am trying to cut back on sweets as well.
I guess I am just frustrated thinking about when I have to go back to work and my pants don't fit because I am heavier than I was before... I want to work out but I am so scared about my scar it keeps me from doing so.
So, why bother? Plus, if I want anymore kids I'm just gonna get heavy again anyway, so why do something if its just gonna go back to the way I am.
It makes me think I shouldn't even try until after I am done having kids...

Saturday, November 15, 2014

2 Months...

As I have been sitting here counting down the days until I go home ( 18) I noticed that it will soon be December and that means it will soon be January.
January will be the hardest month of my mothering life I think. I know that I have talked about this before but I am having a real hard time thinking about going back to work in January. I know sometimes it seems like I talk about the same things over and over again, but when they really bother me I have to voice it in some way and this the best way I feel like I can get all my feelings out.
Tonight, as I was holding Dominic's hand as he cried in his crib and I said yet another prayer for him to find the peace and calmness he needs to go to sleep at night without me holding him I started to cry the 50 millionth tear I have shed over this boy since he was born.
I actually prayed that Dominic would find a way to sleep without needing me and that maybe I will be able to find a way to go to work in January without needing to be near him the way I do.
I love this boy so stinking much its insane and people have told me before that they didn't experience what I feel for their own kids, and it makes me feel like I love too much and too hard.
Someone made a suggestion to me and asked if work would set up a payment plan for me to pay them back what they gave me for those 5 months so I don't have to go back to work, and I know they wouldn't. Plus, I need to go back to work because we have a plan in place, and we thought we might as well set aside the difference of pay from EI and work each time and use that towards something else, like me not working afterwards, or moving to a different place.
I already know that my first day back to work will be the most emotional because I haven't spent more than maybe 5 hours away from him at a time, and well he is very much obsessed with nursing and I will be working on weaning him off and I'm pretty sure I will worry all day long about how Dey is doing by himself. He has never spent more than probably an hour and a half with him alone without me there just in case.
I have so many worries about what will happen, and about how Dominic will cope without me.

Will he forget about the year we spent together?
Will he be sad when I leave because he doesn't get upset now when I do?
Will he not want to be near me as much?
Will I not get cuddles anymore in our rocking chair?
Will I slip into a depression because this anxiety is killing me?
Will I even be able to make it the 6 months of working?

Honestly this is something I am not ready for, and the quicker it approaches the more and more I dread it. I am excited to go home but I know that only 6 days after I get back here I will have to go back to work and that is a scary thought.

On a happy note, I have started my Christmas shopping and hopefully everything I have ordered will be here before I leave to go home. I also need to make a trip to IKEA soon because we are getting Dominic a tent from there to have here for when he gets home. he loves hiding under blankets so I am sure a tent will be a hoot and a half!
Well, happy Saturday night to you all and a wonderful Sunday tomorrow!

Friday, November 14, 2014


After about 6 months of many upsetting and cranky days, drooling faces, and teeth that have been there one day and gone pretty much the same day, it has FINALLY happened. 
About 2 weeks ago I felt a tooth, and wasn't too quick to get excited that it would stay because it's done this before. Well this time it stayed and not only that a second one has popped up right next to it! I would post a picture but he won't let me get a picture or even really look at his teeth.
From what he has flashed me of his little chompers, which he's bite me with more than once while feeding, it looks like one of them is a little less than straight and I think that this is why they have bothered him so much. I think maybe the one kept hitting the other. 
Now that these little suckers have graced us with their presence sleeping has improved, not by much but just a little. I've stopped rocking him to sleep this week because he didn't want to sit still anymore in my arms so now I hold his hand through the crib and eventually, with lots of prayers, he finally goes to sleep. He only wakes up about 3 maybe 4 times a night and that's a lot better than the 7+ times a night he was up before. 
I might go get an ice cream cake tomorrow because I think it's well deserved after all the hard days I was subjected to. 
I love my son but it's not the easiest being his mom some days! 
But YAY for teeth!!! 

Thursday, November 13, 2014


I am clearly a little behind on the times and I haven't blogged about Halloween yet.
So, I decided a while back that I would take Dominic out for Halloween and I would eat his candy... clearly it was sacrifice that was really hard to make for me... I didn't want to take him to very many houses, just a few so that way we could say that he went out.
We talked a lot about what he would be and couldn't decide on anything. We thought about doing a family themed costume but we slacked off and didn't really prepare our costumes at all so that went out the window when we realized Halloween was 1 day away and we didn't have anything for ourselves.
I should say that we went to old navy and it was a sale on everything in the store at 40% off, and we saw the lion and it was the last in his size and we tried it on and it was too cute to say no, and then we noticed a mark on the shoulder of the costume and so we got another 50% off. So we paid about 10$ for it and it was the best thing ever.

I decided that I would just be a cat again... I also just noticed it looks like I'm with child again... nope, not even close... just chubby!

I bought a pumpkin specifically for a picture like this.... I bought his darth vadar candy holder thing that day. it was all that was left.

This was after the first house we went to. The lady gave him a handful of treats and he wouldn't let go of it the entire time.

He thought he was going to get to keep them... sorry kid!

Overall Halloween was a success and I cannot wait to go back out next year and have him ask for the candy himself and I still get to eat it haha I'm a mean mom!

Monday, November 3, 2014

I Love My Family

As I was going through my phone I came across some of the pictures Cortney took for us and I immediately fell more in love with my little family.
Dey, who works so hard for us, and Dominic, who works so hard at growing are two tremendous blessings I have in my life.
There's not much more to say than I am so thankful for everything I have and everything I will have one day. I love my family!